Kate Carlson: Spaghetti served with a side of life lessons

Life lessons can be taught in so many places, but my best came from the family kitchen in Pennsylvania.

I'm fortunate enough to have learned those lessons through three generations of hardworking, independent women. Unfortunately, it took entering adulthood and the loss of our family matriarch for me to realize this.

Growing up in a close-knit Italian family, we got together whenever possible, and a big part of that time was spent in the kitchen. As children, my cousins and I were simply excited to be involved in the making of taralli cookies and spaghetti sauce. Little did we know that we were learning how to share, take turns, and be kind to each other. We thought that if we got to ice the cookies or stir the sauce, the day was a success!

As I grew older, the kitchen became the gathering place for sharing advice -- even if it was sometimes unsolicited. One thing about our family, there are no such things as secrets. The rest of the family probably knows something about you before you know it yourself.

While preparing a meal together (which by the looks of it could have been mistaken as a feast for a king!) my great-grandmother, nanna and aunts would advise me on the trials and tribulations of being a teenager. To be honest, more times than not, I

would brush off their advice that "I'm too young to know true love," or "My time would be better focused on my studies," with teenage arrogance.

As my cousins grew older, we each went our separate ways to college, the military and first jobs. I ended up in Florida 1,000 miles away from home and quickly realized how much I missed those times we spent together. As my great-grandmother Josephine Ritza approached her 101st birthday, we knew what we had been saying for the past decade was finally true, "These may be our last few months with Grammy."

I have found that it is through the highs and lows of life that we most realize the importance of family. It's been 1 1/2 years since Grammy left us, but now more than ever, we share and appreciate our favorite lessons she passed on through the generations.

And it is no coincidence they all surround our time in the kitchen.

As adults, my cousins and I are able to see the true meaning behind each of these lessons. Grammy's passing was one of the hardest times we had to go through as a family, but we did it together. In her memory, we will teach our own children these same valuable lessons:

By staying positive and keeping steady in your faith, you can overcome whatever is thrown your way -- whether that is a bad patch of tomatoes from the garden or the death of a loved one.

If you want to survive, you have to laugh no matter what -- even when the meatballs are burned or you didn't get the job you wanted.

It takes time and effort to make something good -- whether that be a traditional Italian soup, like pasta fagiouli, or a marriage, relationships and family.

Aging is never an excuse to stop living life to the fullest -- even when you are 100 and cooking for your entire family, or refusing to use a cane because it makes you look "old."

You never know where your journey will lead you or how long you'll have precious people in your life, but I am thankful that one thing will remain steady: Through the good and the bad, family will always be there -- and, if you're lucky, with a big pot of spaghetti.

Kate Carlson, public relations coordinator for It Works!, can be reached at katec@itworksglobal.com.

This story was originally published September 6, 2015 at 12:00 AM with the headline "Kate Carlson: Spaghetti served with a side of life lessons ."