Avalos murder case a reminder of the dangers faced from domestic abusers

If there is such a thing as a silver lining in the death of Amber Avalos and two others at the hands of Andres Avalos, it’s a reminder to those trapped in a cycle of domestic violence that there is help available. And a new state grant may help to increase the level of safety to those needing it.

Hope Family Services CEO Laurel Lynch isn’t sure a recent grant from Florida Coalition Against Domestic Violence for legal services to obtain injunctions against abusers would have helped Amber Avalos, but hopefully it will help prevent many other senseless cases of violence in Manatee County. Lynch said somewhere between 10 and 15 percent of fatal domestic violence won’t be prevented unless the victim leaves.

“The vast majority of batterers are just bullies, but there is a percentage of them are truly homicidal like this Avalos guy,” Lynch said. “For those people, an injunction is not the most important thing you can do. Coming to us for help getting out is.”

Now that Avalos has been convicted, Lynch said a lethality review will be done on the case where organizations and experts in domestic violence across the state will come together to see what happened. Lynch said the reviews help to understand the individual case, but it still takes the person being abused to come forward to make a difference. Manatee County has consistently ranked among the highest in the state per capita for domestic violence cases.

“We can have all the experts on domestic violence in the world, but they are the expert on their partner so it’s important to come in so we can put our collective wisdom together and come up with a safety plan,” Lynch said.

The grant fully funds two lawyers for Hope Family Services for a year. It has a minimum requirement that the lawyers help at least 10 victims a month navigate the court system. Lynch said that unfortunately, meeting that minimum is not an issue and she wants to see her two attorneys work even harder. And that’s OK with Hope Family Services attorney Laura Bedford.

“I got involved for a lot of different reasons,” Bedford said. “Mostly because I have a heart for those going through a tough time.”

There are qualifications that have to be met to get the free service and there are a variety of injunctions that can be implemented depending on the case.

“We would rather see them and say, ‘Sorry, we can’t help you,’ and give them additional resources they need rather than them trying to figure it out on their own,” Bedford said.

It’s important to do it right. Lynch, who has been with Hope Family Services for 21 years and another 10 working as an advocate, said she remembers sitting in on a review committee case where a woman filed for an injunction on her own, “and something happened where she couldn’t understand the process. She didn’t do the paperwork right and she didn’t get it. And she died.”

That case started the process that eventually culminated in this new pilot grant program.

Removing the stigma of “one of those women”

Ninety-five percent of women killed by their partners, “never darkened the door of place like Hope Family Services asking for help,” Lynch said.

Part of the problem is those in domestic violence situations don’t want to be labeled “one of those women,” Lynch said. “And I get really cranky when I hear someone say, ‘I don’t understand why these women stay.’ Why don’t you say why does some guy feel they need to beat the heck out of her? Why does society look at her like she’s doing something wrong?”

Lynch said 60 percent of men who abuse their partners, also abuse the children in the home.

“Society doesn’t see the children as co-conspirators,” she said. “Why would we view these women at being at fault? Why can’t we as a culture be proud to say we are one of those women, here I am, and I survived. ”

The disturbing reality isn’t that Hope Family Services helps 2,000 local women every year navigate away from abusers, it’s that Lynch doesn’t know what the real numbers are from the cases that go unreported. And in the case of Amber Avalos, until it’s too late.

If you need help with the agency’s new pilot Injunction for Protection Legal Project, call 941-747-8499. For more information on the services Hope Family Services offers, call the 24-hour help line at 941-755-6805 or visit hopefamilyservice.org.

This story was originally published May 22, 2017 at 2:49 PM with the headline "Avalos murder case a reminder of the dangers faced from domestic abusers."