Investor Column | Estate planning is not just for the dead. It can be a legacy for the living
I sure wish I had taken more pictures and videos of my parents before they died. They do give me satisfaction and a feeling of connection to my roots.
Mom and Dad had the usual estate planning documents, such as a will, trust, living will, etc, but those usually work when illness or death occurs.
Estate planning is not just about the dead and the avoidance of death taxes. It should also be about providing a legacy for the living.
The incapacity or death of a family member is a traumatic event. The emotional turmoil and family pain often may be magnified by the confusion of the plans, assets, and desires of the deceased. The survivors need basic information about what to do. The best way is to use a personal summary.
I wanted their life stories. Do you know about the dash? Your tombstone will have your birth year, a dash, then the year you died.
Tell me about your dash. What did you do while you were here?
You can put these thoughts, emotions, directives, and hopes on the record. It is not a legal document, but rather a spiritual or a personal summary. It shares your thoughts with family and friends.
This concept goes by different names, such as an ethical will, family letter, love letter, love video, etc. Whatever you call it, I suggest using it. I’ll call it a personal summary, whether written or in video format.
I had Mom and Dad put their thoughts to paper. I also had them gather some notes and then I videotaped them for about an hour. Even for an amateur, the video I took turned out quite well, and something is better than nothing.
In my case, I kept it simple with a camera and a home setting. I asked questions about relatives, schools, and life styles. Then I asked about their greatest joys and disappointments.
Mom in particular emphasized her desire to educate her two children.
Mom preplanned her funeral in detail. She included transferring her body from Arizona to Indiana, having the best funeral director, how to do her hair, clothing, the church service, and the names of pall bearers.
She also planned the reception after the internment, right down to the selection of food and drink.
It was her funeral and she chose to go out in style. A prior article I wrote discussed “Going out in style.” Why not?
It you have left assets to one or more charitable organizations or clubs, the personal summary enables you to explain your reasons to family members who may feel slighted that they did not receive these gifts.
The personal summary may also explain things you didn’t do, but wish you had. As painful as some of these remembrances may be, consider the value of conveying anything that you regret saying or not saying and forgiving or asking forgiveness.
There are many other things to include in your personal summary, such as do you want cremation or burial, locations of extra keys and what they are for, locations of safe deposit boxes, who do you want for your pall bearers, who are your trusted contacts, etc?
When I recently redid my will and trust, I asked my attorney about it. She said she frequently does a personal summary and there are many ways of doing it.
You can go to a professional videographer and make it into your own Hollywood movie. I could have used my attorney’s office for the background.
For my own personal summary, I’ll mount my iPhone on a tripod and start videotaping. It may not be professionally done, but it’s easy to do, and I want to do it. My family some day may ask: “Who was that guy who moved from Chicago to Florida in 1972?”
As a service for my clients, I have a conference room they can use.
These brief comments should be a starting point and should be expanded and tailored for your personal summary. Just go do it before it’s too late. It takes a little effort, but you will be remembered forever.
Jim Zientara is a financial planner with Raymond James Financial Services Inc. Member FINRA/SIPC. Investment Advisory Services are offered through Raymond James Financial Services Advisors, Inc. He can be reached at 941-750-6818 or at www.raymondjames.com/jz with office at 11009 Gatewood Drive, Suite 101, Lakewood Ranch, FL 34211. Any opinions are those of Jim Zientara and not necessarily those of Raymond James.
This material is being provided for information purposes only, and is not a complete description, nor is it specific investment advice. Consult a financial advisor about your unique situation. Raymond James Financial Services and its advisors do not provide advice on legal issues or tax matters.
This story was originally published February 10, 2020 at 7:33 AM with the headline "Investor Column | Estate planning is not just for the dead. It can be a legacy for the living."