Faith Matters | Me and my friend, Father Joe. Our faith journeys differ but we share a common bond
Over the years that I have been writing this column I have been fortunate enough to make some wonderful friends out in the community – and also welcomed quite a few new members into our congregation. I have appreciated the opportunity to engage with all kinds of people around issues of faith and life. One of my favorite friendships to come out of these articles is with Father Joe. Father Joe Connolly is the pastor of Our Lady Queen of Martyrs, which yes, is a Catholic Church.
Seems like an unlikely friendship, doesn’t it? A Catholic priest and Protestant pastor who happens not to be a male. So, so, so many stereotypes to go around here. Of course, you, the reader, would have no way of knowing the background behind why Father Joe is so important to me.
Long before I was a Presbyterian minister, I was a little girl with a Methodist mother and a Roman Catholic father, who got married in a Presbyterian Church despite severe protests from my Southern Baptist-converted-to-Catholicism paternal grandmother. Many theological issues were hotly debated upon my arrival (first grandchild) into the world, not the least of which was my baptism – which was compounded by the fact that I was born in the middle of a blizzard and infant car seats weren’t really a thing back then.
As I got older, my Italian, Roman Catholic grandfather, would take my then Presbyterian-self to see the Baltimore Orioles (way back when it worth paying to go see them play) with his dear friend, Father Daniel McGuire, who was a Jesuit at Loyola College in Maryland. I loved Father McGuire. He was born in Limerick, Ireland, and he could have read the phone book and I would have been transfixed.
Being only 10 or 11, I had no idea about theological rifts or scandals or anything that would hinder me from tagging along with Grandpa and Father McGuire to see the Orioles play. It was only as I got older that I learned that apparently we’re all supposed to stay in our theological lane and that there would be an “us” and a “them.” By the time I reached seminary, I learned that it was more than “us” and “them.” It was also “those guys” and “that group over there.” Even as the recent wave of non-denominationalism has crested, we recognize that even they are a denomination, a belief system, unto itself.
And with all of these different ways to approach the faith, each one of us has to make some decisions about who we’re willing to give space to in our individual lives. It’s true that there are some issues that Catholic and Protestants see differently, although I’m not convinced that it’s as many as some make them out to be. It’s even true that among people of the same denomination that there can be disagreements about some very complicated (and sometimes not-so-complicated) beliefs and practices. But if you follow that line of thought to its ultimate conclusion, and we separated every time we disagreed with one another, each one of us would end up as a church of 1 and that’s definitely not the way of Jesus who said, “wherever two or three are gathered in my name, there I am.”
Speaking of Jesus, at the end of the day, He’s the one that this whole thing is really all about. He’s the one that connects us and unites us. He’s the ultimate essential in a world filled with non-essentials.
Every now and again, a word of encouragement from Father Connolly shows up in my inbox or through snail mail. No theological showdowns, no torrents or diatribes about how wrong my beliefs are. Just words of encouragement and assurances of prayer. It reminds me of Father McGuire, who would show up to Orioles games in clerical garb and who kept pointing me to Jesus when we lost my Grandpa. We need “those” people in our lives – people who pray for us, who encourage us, who truly want God’s best for us – even if “those” people are sitting in a different congregation come Sunday morning.
May you find yourself surrounded by “those” people and “that group over there” and “them” throughout 2020 and beyond! Your life will be fuller and your faith even stronger with them in it. Thanks, Father Joe!
The Rev. Hope Italiano Lee, lead pastor of Kirkwood Presbyterian Church and The Well, can be reached at 941-794-6229, hope@kpcbradenton.org or biggreenchurch.org. Faith Matters is a regular feature of Saturday’s Bradenton Herald written by local clergy members.
This story was originally published January 3, 2020 at 8:00 AM.