Baby Talk: As Father’s Day nears, it’s important for all dads to know how important they are

Fathers are important. The absence of a father or a father figure in a child’s life can have lifelong implications for a child and for the child’s mother.

Unfortunately, tragedies occur and biological fathers cannot be around their children.

We are living in a time where many military fathers and mothers are being deployed overseas. Whatever the reason, it is always a struggle for the remaining parent to raise a child alone.

There is a reason the French say viva la difference.

Mothers and fathers are different. Mothers are more likely to have parenting techniques that include gentleness, which can lead to a sense of security for the child.

Fathers tend to foster independence, which helps with confidence building. These approaches help children understand that there are different ways of approaching life and relationships. This may not always be the case.

I have a wonderful neighbor who is an awesome mother and she prides herself on being strict, no nonsense: “You will obey” and “I really don’t care what you want, you will follow the rules.”

Her husband was more the gentle one.

Fathers tend to play more roughly than mothers. When a father is playing a rough-and-tumble game with a child, he is at the same time teaching his child how to manage aggressive impulses. This type of play also helps in learning how to control emotions during physical play. Playing rough-and-tumble games helps a child learn using one’s body safely can be fun.

One of my son-in-laws likes to play “crash.” He picks up his son and lets his son fall down on a well-padded surface and they yell “crash” together. It is great fun for both of them. It is an outlet of energy, a connecting game and something that my grandson eagerly looks forward to doing with his father.

Children need committed mothers and fathers or someone who is willing to take on that role. Statistics are hard to argue with.

In 1965, Daniel Patrick Monyihan wrote about the long-term ramifications of when there is no father or father figure in a child’s life. He knew personally how difficult it is for a child when a father abandons his family. His own father left when he was only 10 years old. He wrote prolifically about the strain on the family when there is no father, economically and emotionally.

Soon it will be Father’s Day. There will be cards shared, messages written, presents given to fathers all over the country.

Former college basketball coach Jim Valvano once said: “My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person. He believed in me.”

This is one of the greatest gifts fathers give to their children.

Know how important you are, always.

Katie Powers, R.N., is a board-certified lactation consultant and perinatal educator at Manatee Memorial Hospital’s Family BirthPlace. Her column appears every other week in Healthy Living in the Bradenton Herald. Contact her at katie.powers@mmhhs.com.

This story was originally published June 3, 2019 at 10:54 AM.