The gun salesman to his customer, “My friend, you should buy this assault rifle. I just sold one to another guy a few minutes ago and you may need to protect yourself from him.
“You know the average response to a 911 call is 10 minutes and until they get there, you need to protect yourself from anyone who breaks into your house and starts shooting. And if you are in a crowd and a bad guy with a gun starts shooting, you can be the good guy with a gun and take him out with this assault rifle.
“ And one other thing: Be sure you know exactly when the police get there. Before they even get out of their car, you should put this weapon down because they might mistake you for the bad guy with the gun and open up on you.
“So you really need this assault rifle and to be doubly safe, you had better buy the 100-round clip to go with it in case the government shows up at your door with soldiers and a tank to try to take it away from you.”